The Gifts of Depression -

Finding Light in the Dark Places

Over the years, I’ve heard the view that depression is a weakness, expressed in different ways and from different sources.

As someone who has lived with depression, it can be hard not to take these messages personally. They feed into the propaganda of the inner critic and feel like a character judgment - yet more layers to the sense of being “not okay” that many of us with depression already heap upon ourselves.

And yet, some of history’s most influential figures including Ludwig van Beethoven, Isaac Newton, Virginia Woolf and Winston Churchill, also lived with depression. Their lives remind us that struggling with low mood does not make us weak; it makes us human.

In fact, perhaps depression doesn’t just co-exist with greatness, it may even contribute to it. The very qualities honed in the dark places - sensitivity, depth of thought, perseverance, and empathy - can also fuel creativity, insight, and excellence. Without darkness, the light does not shine so brightly.

One of the reasons I choose to write and speak openly about my experiences is to help lift the stigma around depression. I also hope that sharing the insights I’ve gained - from both my own journey and from supporting clients as a therapeutic coach - might offer support to others who find themselves in these dark places.

Of course, depression affects each of us differently. What I share here is only my own experience. Please take what is helpful, and leave the rest.

Living with Depression

Depression can feel like a dead weight or an impenetrable black cloud. Someone recently described it to me as being in a tunnel where the glimmer of light turns out to be an oncoming train.

For me, my experience has mostly been mild to moderate, but recurrent. It feels as though my inner happiness thermometer is set on “low,” with life’s inevitable challenges - loss, transition, stress and overwhelm - sometimes tipping me into a full episode.

I’ve learned to notice the tell-tale signs:

• A felt sense of heaviness in body, heart and mind

• Tears welling at the slightest setback

• Enjoyable activities suddenly feeling like chores

• An internal dialogue that turns hyper-negative and hopeless

• A pull to withdraw and avoid connection

  
  

If this sounds familiar, please know you’re not alone. And if you haven’t yet sought support, I warmly encourage you to explore what may be available - whether through your GP, a trusted friend, or specialist organisations (I’ve included some resources at the end of this post).

Mindfulness, Compassion, and Depression

Some of the most powerful supports I’ve found are mindfulness, compassion, and the healing balm of nature.

Mindfulness-Based Cognitive Therapy (MBCT) was originally developed to support those at risk of depressive relapse. Research shows that it can interrupt two common patterns that keep us stuck:

• Rumination – repetitive, self-recriminating thought loops such as:

  
  

  “I’m feeling low. What’s wrong with me? I should be coping better by now! Why do I keep feeling like this?”

  
  

  We try to “think” our way out of emotional distress, but thinking only digs the rut deeper.

  
  

• Experiential avoidance – doing everything we can to push away difficult feelings, which ironically makes them more persistent.

Through mindfulness, I’ve learned to recognise that thoughts are not facts. That recognition doesn’t make the sadness vanish, but it loosens the grip. Over time, my practices of mindfulness and compassion have helped me:

• notice an episode earlier

• respond with kindness rather than self-criticism

• take supportive actions toward recovery

They have also helped me open to a wider perspective. I sometimes think of the famous Earthrise photograph taken from space - the moment humanity first saw our small, fragile planet suspended in the vastness of the cosmos. From that vantage point, the details of our struggles look different: still real, still part of us, but held within a much greater whole. Mindfulness offers something similar. It doesn’t erase the pain, but it allows me to see it in context, to hold it with more spaciousness and compassion.

Ruby Wax’s memoirs on depression ring true to me: mindfulness isn’t a miracle cure, but it can be a lifeline.

Learning from Depression

There is a beautiful poem by Portia Nelson, Autobiography in Five Chapters, often shared in MBCT courses. She likens depression to falling into the same hole in the street, again and again - until, eventually, she learns to walk down a different street.

Sometimes I manage that too. Other times, the well-worn path is too tempting or external pressures too strong, and I fall in again. In those moments, I hear the familiar self-recrimination: I should know better. Why am I here again? Am I broken?

But with support and inner work, I’ve learned to see those harsh inner messages for what they are - just thoughts, not truths. In those moments, I try to meet myself with patience and gentleness, offering kind messages instead of criticism. Little by little, I am learning to be on my own side, extending the same care and compassion to myself that I would to a dear friend.

So, while part of me would gladly wave a magic wand to make my depression vanish, another part recognises its gifts. Without it, I may not have walked the path of mindfulness, or developed the compassion, depth, and resilience that I now bring to my work.

Without depression, I might not:

• Have pursued mindfulness in the first place

• Possess the deep empathy and sensitivity I now offer to clients

• Have learned to hold space for difficulty - both my own and others’

• Have been motivated to explore healing modalities that I am now trained to share

• Experience such gratitude for life’s small moments of joy

  
  

Without the darkness, I might not fully appreciate the light.

Nature as Teacher

In recent years, a crucial part of my healing has been deepening my connection with nature.

Research shows that time in nature supports both physical and mental health. In the UK, “green prescribing” now recognises this, with doctors able to prescribe nature-based therapies like the ones I offer.

Many of today’s crises - personal, social, ecological - can be seen as crises of separation:

• separation from ourselves

• separation from each other

• separation from the natural world

  
  

As Otto Scharmer notes, these disconnections widen the ecological, social, and spiritual divides. Healing begins when we reconnect - with ourselves, with others, and with the earth.

Walking in the woods with my dog, or during walk-and-talk coaching sessions, I feel this reconnection viscerally. I am nature, and nature is me.

When I face stuckness - whether with an essay, a blog post, or a personal challenge - time in the forest often brings clarity, inspiration, or simply gratitude for the steady, holding presence of the natural world.

Nature’s Seasons, Nature’s Wisdom

Each season carries its own wisdom, and the most recent turn of the wheel has offered me these insights:

• Winter invites grieving and acceptance of what has passed.

• Spring encourages us to trust in fragile beginnings.

• Summer offers rest, appreciation, and fullness.

• Autumn calls us to release old scripts and burdens, just as the trees let go of their leaves—gracefully, without resistance, trusting in renewal.

With the first hints of autumn in the September air, I find myself recalling the words of a mentor: “Let it go and make it easy.”

I’m not suggesting that any of this is truly easy. But, like the trees, we can learn to loosen our grip. Through mindfulness, compassion, and connection with nature, I believe we can approach life with a little more ease, softness, and acceptance.

Final Thoughts and Resources

Depression is as individual as each person who experiences it. My story is only one perspective. What works for me may not suit everyone.

Asking for help, and speaking honestly to a trusted friend, family member, or professional, is a brave and vital step. For some, medication can provide the stability needed to allow other supports - like mindfulness and nature connection - to take root.

If you’d like to explore nature-based mindfulness and compassionate coaching with me, I warmly invite you to get in touch.

You may also find these resources supportive:

• The Mindful Way Through Depression – book and audio practices from MBCT

• Mind – UK charity offering mental health support

• NAMI – US grassroots organisation offering support and education

• Breaking Depression – global campaign to break stigma

• Find a Helpline – international database of 1,300+ helplines across 130 countries

I have also recently signed up for poet Rosemerry Wahtola Trommer's daily poetry offer and I find reading her poem each morning a beautiful and reflective way to start the day. Here is an example of her work that expresses the themes above beautifully.